When it's time to SLOW down. WARNING TOO MUCH INFO POST- not for the squeamish.

*First off I would like to start this post by letting you know I will be getting gross, and ridiculously personal. I will be talking about my bum so stop reading now if you are any kind of bashful.*

Baby girl one trait I hope you can have that I don’t is patience and an ability to SLOW DOWN. I’m always gogogoing till I burn out and hibernate in front of the computer watching Hulu for some gross amount of time. It is so hard for me to sit still when there’s cleaning to do, paperwork to be organized, or emails to be answered. It’s SO hard for me and I have no idea why.

While I have enjoyed and fully soaked in every moment since you have been born there is one thing I regret and it’s the fact I did not slow down after I had you. Yes, I was hyped up on some crazy amount of “good feeling hormones” from having a natural birth yet I still should have forced myself to take a break to properly heal up.

5 months after giving birth I’m starting to feel like myself again. I’m 2 pounds under my pre-prego weight and am almost healed completely. I say almost because I have been suffering a bit. When I gave birth with you I felt like my bottom was tearing out. And your Dad will never let me forget yelling at the top of my lungs about that fact the last half hour of your birth. I found out later in reality it was. I was so thankful to not get hemorrhoids when I was pregnant or gave birth. I was so worried about that. My rear was doing good after I gave birth I teared a very very little bit but I didn’t even need stitches. while going number 2 was terrifying the first time after giving birth it went fine. Fast forward to when you’re a month old and I’m in the bathroom thinking I’m about to die.

Because I decided to go to Target the day after you were born, decided to take you food shopping with me the second day after you were born and went back to working from home within a week of you being born I had not healed like I should of. I had developed Anal Fissures. For some of you who don’t know what these are they are hell on earth. They are little tears in your anal wall so every time you go number 2 they re-tear open the scab they have developed and bleed profusely. It is the number three most painful thing you can have happen to your rear end right after healing from anal surgery. My midwife promised me these things were normal if not common after giving birth. If that was the case why hadn’t anyone told me about them before?! The things you learn AFTER you give birth is always amazing. I’m more then certain if I had rested for a few weeks at least after giving birth I would have not had this horrible problem develop. The worst thing about this problem is there’s no real cure for it. The doctor gave me some SUPER hard core pain killers but that didn’t stop the pain as much as I would have hoped and I didn’t like being stoned everyday on narcotics just to poo. The next alternative is surgery or Botox shot in the bum. Remember how I just said the NEXT most painful thing you can go through in your bum is recovery from anal surgery? I’ve been taking it easy for awhile now and staying out of hard chairs and such bum hurting situations. It seems to be working and healing on it’s own but I really won’t know for a couple months if it really has gone away.

So, why am I posting this embarr”ass”ing (harhar) story you ask? So I can inspire you little one and any of our prego readers to take an easy after they give birth. Even if you feel like you can take the world on slow down for a bit your body needs and deserves it.